Romans 15:13
“May the God of hope fill you with all joy and peace in believing, so that by the power of the Holy Spirit you may abound in hope.”
Hey Family,
I know that some of you have been wondering where I’ve been, and to be honest—I’ve been at home, going through pockets of depression, trying to figure out this season of grief.
I’m three and a half years in, and to be honest, some days it still feels like it just happened yesterday. But I am pressing toward the mark in Christ Jesus. The good thing is that I’ve been consistent with therapy—both grief and trauma—and it helps having someone outside of God to talk to and release the wave of emotions I’ve been experiencing. Last week was very hard for me. I had many ups and downs that sometimes left me in tears for most of the day. I found myself asking, “Can God create a next?” I hate even speaking that way because I know that He is doing something, but at times it’s just so hard because I can’t see it. I told God last week that I was angry, because I hate these parts of the journey where it feels like all hope is lost. But in the midst of it all, I just keep hearing God say, “Keep reading.”
And at times, it’s just me listening to the Word and reaching out for prayer.
Romans 10:14-16
New King James Version
Israel Rejects the Gospel
14 How then shall they call on Him in whom they have not believed? And how shall they believe in Him of whom they have not heard? And how shall they hear without a preacher? 15 And how shall they preach unless they are sent? As it is written:
“How beautiful are the feet of those who [a]preach the gospel of peace,
Who bring glad tidings of good things!” 16 But they have not all obeyed the gospel. For Isaiah says, “Lord, who has believed our report?”
Prayer and worship have been my strength, and I even added a little Mary J. Blige to the mix as I was driving to trauma therapy this morning.
But it’s the lyrics to her song “Be Happy” that, when I was singing, I felt like I had to come and encourage someone else today:
All I really want (Yeah)
Is to be happy (Oh, yeah)
And to find a love that’s mine (Ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh)
It would be so sweet (Hey)
All I really want (Oh)
Is to be happy (I wanna be happy, yeah)
And to find a love that’s mine (Yeah-yeah, yeah-yeah)
It would be so sweet.
And the truth is—the Gospel is the sweetest love that we have, expressing God’s love for His children even in hard times. God sent forth His Word because He wants us to be happy. But for some of us, because of grief, we’re not walking that out. The devil has given us a narrative that only some wounds can be soothed—but that is not the truth.
John 19:30 (KJV):
“When Jesus therefore had received the vinegar, he said, It is finished: and he bowed his head, and gave up the ghost.”
When Jesus went to the cross and spoke those three words— “It is finished”—He meant it. It really was finished. All God is asking us to do is remember that He is sweet and that His love is endless and stronger than depression and the worries of this world. Try not to be hard on yourself. Grace is a two-way street—it is given to us by God so that we, in turn, can give it to others and to ourselves.
🎶 Song of the Week: “Be Happy” by Mary J. Blige
This week, I found myself deeply moved while driving to trauma therapy. As my mama would always say, “Put on something that lifts your spirit!” So that’s what I did. Sometimes, music can be the ministry that meets you right where you’re at.
Disclaimer: I do not own the rights to the song “Be Happy” by Mary J. Blige. All rights belong to the original artist and copyright holders. This reference is used for inspirational purposes only.
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