August 1st 2:45pm
As I lay here in bed, I think about how the seasons have changed so quickly. Time is flying by like eagle in the wind, and I am forced to keep moving even when I don’t feel like it. It was fall when Joshua died. I remember so vividly sitting by my widow after the funeral wondering how I was going to survive this storm. But God has kept me since that dark day. I would sit there and just watch the wind blow in the trees and for some reason the thought of life and how quickly it can change gripped to me.
Life is like a vapor, Ecclesiastes 1:2-4
From the trees to the basketball court is where my eyes would sway because when Joshua was home that is where you would hear his voice yell “Somebody throw me a water” I miss him dearly. Find rest is me is what the Lord says as I type, Find rest in me.
Psalm 55:6 reads I said,” Oh, that I had the wings of a dove’ I would fly away and be at rest.
Personal Prayer: Lord give me rest like I have never felt before. Father this is your story I am just walking it out. Let your voice be heard by your sons and daughters as they read this week. I pray that they will know that healing is available, and that forgiveness leads to that.
It is quite easy to stay angry when someone has wronged you, let alone taken the life of a loved one. Romans (NIV)12:17 says “Do not repay anyone evil for evil. Be careful to do what is right in the eyes of everyone.” I remember when Joshua passed, I had people say that I was better than them because if it were their child, they would want no mercy shown when they get caught. But what I reminded them is that God is the ultimate judge and has the final say on every matter including this. And I don’t say that on the strength of me because I am weak, but the Holy Spirit who is able, He is the one that speaks for me on this matter because I honestly have no words to say, and I do not want to speak as a foolish woman – Job 2:9-10 says Then Job’s wife said to him, “Do you still retain your integrity? Curse God and die! “You speak as a foolish woman speaks,” he told her. “Should we accept from God only good and not adversity?” In all this, Job did not sin in what he said.
Proverbs 18:21- The tongue has the power of life and death, and those who love it will eat its fruit.
Be careful what comes out of your mouth even in frustrating situations you could end up eating the fruit of it
The Lord told me to ask them this. “Can you make a life? Can you place a soul into this clay body that we dwell in while here on earth? The answer is No, and what God showed me was that we are to be careful when we speak but most importantly remember that God has the final say and as humans’ beings, we do not have the right to determine other people’s outcome. No life should be cut before its time. So I had two choices at that point, I could get angry, bitter, and resentful or pray that GOD would show me what to do with those emotions when they tried to settle in. When you make the decision to follow God there are a few commandments that we are to follow. Some easier than other but learning to forgive is a huge one.
In the book of Matthew 18:21-22 we see a teaching on letting go when we have been wronged (AMP) Then Peter came to Jesus and asked, “Lord, how many times shall I forgive my brother or sister who sins against me? Up to seven times?” Before I put in Jesus’s response, I need to touch on what Sin is and why it all looks the same before God. 1 John 5:17 says All wrongdoing is sin, and there is sin that does not lead to death. When it is all said and done no matter what the Sin is when it comes before God Sin is Sin, equal no matter how we want to look at it. And some may ask why? because wrongdoing +wrongdoing =wrongdoing.
If you read 1 John 5:16 it says If you see any brother or sister commit a sin that does not lead to death, you should pray, and God will give them life. I want you to know that no matter what wrongdoing has been done God is always there to forgive and strengthen you to make better choices. For some reason I felt like someone needed to read that.
Jesus responded to Peter by tell him , “I tell you, not seven times, but seventy-seven times.
As I was writing this the Lord showed me a complete circle. A circle has no end so therefore we are to never stop forgiven people no matter what level or degree they have wronged us. Forgive the same way that you would want to be Forgiven and love the same way that God loves you.
Prayer Time
Lord something terrible has happened to my family and your other sons and daughters only you can take away the hurt that we feel. We live in a world filled with anger and pain that could cause someone to commit a malicious act. Where people feel that they have the right to harm others based on what they feel has been done to them. Lord help me, help us. Open our eyes to see that this was never the way you designed us to live. Lord forgiveness is the topic this week and I do not even fully understand it at times. But I pray that we would be open to hear what you have to say about this matter. Help us hear you speak and deal with this mountain of unforgiveness. Help us to see that wrongdoings happen but we are to forgive others just like you have forgiven us. Help us to practice we preach no matter the circumstances. I know that it is easier said than done but lead us in this matter like only you can.
Help us to remember that if they tables were turned, we would want a second chance. Hate is heavy but Forgiveness is light, family give that burden to God let him manage the situation because the truth is he knows best.
Breathe, I know this week’s word was meaty and hard to digest. It is hard to forgive especially when you are the one that was wronged but we have to let God work it out and remember he holds the keys in his hand.
To the people that was involved in Joshua death know that forgiveness is available from Holy one. Also, I want you to know that I have forgiven you a long time ago, I pray for you often just like I prayed for Joshua when he was alive. Know that God loves you and that the same blood that was shed for me on the cross was for you too-don’t fear the outcome fear God do the right thing.
Turn yourself in, it will look better on your part
People until next time God willing and stay blessed and continue to pray about what is troubling you. And To my daughter Shan thank you for taking over on the graphics may God pour back into you.
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